As far as the rites of Hajj are concerned, there is nothing wrong for a husband and wife in the state of ihram to sleep on one bed as long as they avoid intercourse and all that may lead to it including touching with desire, kissing and the like. In other words, intercourse and its foreplay are prohibited for spouses while they are in the state of ihram.
On this issue, Sheikh M. S. Al-Munajjid, a prominent scholar and author, states:
“What is forbidden for the pilgrim in ihram is intercourse and touching with desire or kissing, because Almighty Allah says: (The Hajj (pilgrimage) is (in) the well-known (lunar year) months. So whosoever intends to perform Hajj therein (by assuming ihram), then he should not have sexual relations (with his wife), nor commit sin, nor dispute unjustly during the Hajj)(Al-Baqarah 2:197).
In his tafseer (exegesis) of this verse, Ibn Kathir (may Allah be merciful with him)said, “The words fa laa ra
fatha (translated here as “should not have sexual relations”) mean that the one who enters ihram for Hajj or `Umrah should avoid intercourse. Similarly it says elsewhere: (It is made lawful for you to have sexual relations [ar-Rafath] with your wives on the night of As-Sawm (the fasts).) (Al-Baqarah 2: 187). It is also forbidden to do anything that leads up to sexual intercourse such as touching, kissing and so on, and to speak of it in the presence of women.”
An-Nawawi (may Allah have mercy on him) said: “Ash-Shafi`i and our companions agreed that it is forbidden for the pilgrim in ihram to be intimate with desire such as foreplay, kissing, touching and so on. Touching without desire is not forbidden, and there is no difference of scholarly opinion on this point.”
In Al-Mawsu`ah Al-Fiqhiyyah (vol. 2, p. 186) it says: “It is forbidden for the pilgrim in ihram, according to scholarly consensus and the consensus of the Ummah, to have intercourse or do or say anything that leads to it, or to satisfy one’s sexual desires in any way.
Shaykh Ibn `Uthaymeen (may Allah have mercy on him) said in Ash-Sharh Al-Mumti` (vol. 7, p. 184), when discussing the things that are forbidden when in ihram: “… being intimate with women, with desire; as for touching without desire, such as if a man touches his wife’s hand, this is not haram.”
Based on this, if a pilgrim in ihram sleeps in the same bed with his wife or touches her without desire, there is nothing wrong with that, but if he fears that it may lead him to do something forbidden, then he should sleep in a separate bed.