A common and distressing challenge for many Muslim women is the situation where a husband doesn’t pray, often justifying his neglect by claiming that as long as he abstains from major sins like alcohol and adultery, he remains a good Muslim. This article addresses this dangerous misconception and offers advice on how to encourage a spouse to establish the prayer (Salah).

The Status of Prayer in Islam

There is no doubt that neglecting prayers out of laziness is one of the most heinous sins in Islam. Salah is not merely an optional ritual; it is the second pillar of Islam and the very foundation of a believer’s relationship with Allah.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

“Islam is based on (the following) five (principles): To testify that none has the right to be worshipped but Allah and Muhammad is Allah’s Apostle; to offer the (compulsory congregational) prayers dutifully and perfectly; to pay Zakat (i.e. obligatory charity); to perform Hajj. (i.e. Pilgrimage to Mecca), and to observe fast during the month of Ramadan.” (Sahih al-Bukhari 8)

The Misconception of “Being Good Enough”

It is a grave error to believe that avoiding prohibitions (like zina or alcohol) is a substitute for fulfilling obligations. A Muslim must do both: fulfill commands and abstain from forbidden acts. Prayer stands at the very top of these obligatory acts.

Refraining from alcohol and adultery is praiseworthy, but it does not compensate for the abandonment of the daily prayers. The distinction between a believer and disbelief often lies in the establishment of prayer.

The First Question on Judgment Day

One should remind a neglectful spouse of the gravity of the Day of Judgment. The prayer is the first metric by which a person’s entire life will be judged.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

“The first of man’s deeds for which he will be called to account on the Day of Resurrection will be Salat. If it is found to be perfect, he will be safe and successful; but if it is incomplete, he will be unfortunate and a loser.” (Jami` at-Tirmidhi 413)

If the prayer is sound, the rest of the deeds are hoped to be sound; if it is lacking, the rest of the deeds are in peril.

Wisdom and Gentleness in Advice

Changing a spouse’s heart requires patience, wisdom, and gentleness. A wife should not give up on her husband but should continue to advise him kindly.

  • Remind him of Allah’s mercy and punishment: Use verses of the Qur’an and Hadith.
  • Seek external support: If direct advice is ignored, one may seek the help of a local Imam, righteous friends, or influential family members who can speak to him wisely.
  • Make Dua: Never underestimate the power of supplication for his guidance.