In Islam, the most fundamental question when choosing a partner is that of his or her religious piety, but this does not mean that other considerations are to be neglected. Marriage is a life-long partnership and hence each spouse should make the decision after proper study of the person he/she will live with.
Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states: Since marriage in Islam is a partnership based on free choice, it is ultimately a lady’s choice to decide whom they wish to marry, so long as they exercise their choice under the guidance of their parents or guardians.
Although it is recommended that a lady accepts a proposal from a person with good morals and character, a lady is not obligated to marry a guy if his demeanour does not please her.
By this I do not wish to imply that we simply reject a proposal without proper study of the person. Rather we should ask people of integrity who know the person closely about his character and morals. If he is certainly of a harsh nature or any other bad behaviour, we are not to be blamed for rejecting him even if he is good in terms of deen.
Lastly, we should condition ourselves to make such choices only after due deliberation and istikharah (prayer for guidance in decision making). The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “One who seeks counsel from Allah (through istikharah) will never be disappointed; one who consults (people of integrity) before decision making will have no reason to regret.