In Islam, being dutiful to parents is an essential part of faith, and children are encouraged to respect and care for their parents at all times. However, it is also important to recognize that maintaining personal well-being in Islam is crucial for fulfilling responsibilities effectively. Many individuals struggle to balance work, household duties, and personal time, especially when faced with demanding family expectations.

Understanding Parental Rights and Children’s Well-Being

Islam emphasizes kindness, patience, and respect towards parents. The Quran states:

“And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.” (Surah Luqman 31:14)

However, Islam also upholds justice and fairness, and no individual should be subjected to undue hardship or emotional distress, even by their own family. While serving parents is a virtue, it should not lead to physical or emotional harm.

The Challenge of Overburdened Responsibilities

In many families, children—particularly daughters—bear the brunt of household responsibilities even while managing work outside the home. While caring for parents and accommodating guests is commendable, excessive burdens can lead to exhaustion, frustration, and even strained relationships.

When children feel overwhelmed, it is important for parents to recognize their limitations. The Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) taught compassion and fairness in family relationships, ensuring that no one is overburdened unfairly.

Dealing with Parental Disapproval and Difficult Duaas

Some individuals face situations where their parents react harshly to their exhaustion or perceived disobedience, sometimes making negative supplications (dua) against them. This can be emotionally distressing, especially for those who strive to maintain respect and kindness.

It is important to remember that Allah is the Most Just and Most Merciful. While parents’ prayers hold great weight, unjust supplications made in anger do not harm a person if they are undeserved. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) emphasized that Allah does not accept unjust supplications.

“A person’s supplication will be answered as long as he does not ask for sin or for the severance of family ties.” (Muslim 2735)

Children should continue to uphold kindness, patience, and prayers for their parents while also seeking balance in their own well-being.

Practical Steps to Maintain Balance and Harmony

  • Open Communication: Speaking to parents with respect about personal limitations can sometimes help in easing expectations.
  • Seeking Mediation: If direct conversations do not help, involving a trusted family member or religious advisor can provide an alternative perspective.
  • Time Management: Planning work, household duties, and self-care effectively can reduce exhaustion.
  • Dua and Reliance on Allah: Continuously seeking Allah’s guidance through dua, including asking for ease in relationships, is a powerful means of finding solutions.
  • Support Networks: Seeking advice from scholars, support groups, or counselors can provide clarity and emotional relief.

Conclusion

Islam encourages kindness, patience, and respect in family relationships. However, it does not condone emotional or physical harm. Children should strive to maintain balance by fulfilling their duties while ensuring their own well-being. Open communication, reliance on Allah, and seeking support from trusted individuals can help navigate such challenges, ensuring that both parents and children maintain a relationship of love, understanding, and mutual respect.