Shaving Hair

Shaving Hair After Hajj and `Umrah

I have three questions:1. I have long hair. My relatives were after me to cut them short. However, I had decided in my heart that I would cut (shave) them when I would perform Hajj or when I would marry. This was not a 'mannat'/vow but just an intention. I did not say it aloud and neither did I think of it as a 'mannat'. Now, I know that the Prophet (PBUH) had prayed for the one who shaves his head three times before he included the one who cuts his hair in his prayer. Also, that the Prophet told the muslims to perform Hajj Tamattu (and that it is preferable ???). Now my question is that I am going for Hajj this year and I intend to perform Hajj Tamattu, Insha Allah; so can I shave my hair after Umrah or do I need to cut it short after Umrah and then shave after performing Hajj (bcos my intention was to shave after Hajj)? I want to shave after Umrah itself because I want to get the full benefit of the Prophet's dua. I also want to perform Hajj Tamattu, because the Prophet told the muslims to do so. [Sorry if this question seems a bit childish, but it troubles my mind, so I have decided to ask rather than know later that I have done something wrong. By the way, my heart inclines towards shaving my head after Umrah, because it was just a intention and I don't think I upgraded it to a 'mannat'. I also wonder if I am wrong in thinking of Umrah as separate fro m Hajj, because I AM performing Hajj Tamattu which includes both Hajj and Umrah][P.S. I will be travelling for Hajj on the 14th of December from Mumbai, India, Insha Allah].2. What should I do if I have a wet dream (ihtilam) during Hajj ???3. Is it compulsory to marry before one performs Hajj? [My mother was starting to search for suitable brides, but I told her that I want to perform Hajj before I marry. I want to make myself as pure as possible before I engage myself to another person for the rest of our lives, Insha Allah. I have done sins for which I am ashamed of and hope that Allah will forgive all my sins and make me a worthy and pure husband and muslim and part of this ummah, Insha Allah.]