A New Muslim: My Religion or My Parents?
Assalamou alaikoum dear scholars. I would like to ask your advice on which decision is the most appropriate according to Islam. I am a Canadian convert. I left my small hometown to live in Toronto after converting to Islam because it was to difficult for me to live in my small hometown where the muslim community is small and because things were difficult with my parents. Living in the metropolis has helped me a lot because I have access to lots of teaching, I made lots of friends convert and born-muslim, and I feel free to practice my religion. Now my parents are getting older and they are starting to need help and I feel guilty that I cannot always help them, so I wonder if I should go back to live in their small town. My non-muslim brother lives close to my parents, but he is not always reliable to help them. This decision brings me anxiety. Going back would allow me to help more my parents, but living in my hometown would bring me pain from memories of before Islam, would bring me pressure from my family who wish I would leave Islam and do not want people to know I converted, I am afraid I will compromise in my religion because of my parents' pressure (like I would not wear hijab), I would be more isolated without the muslim support I have in Toronto and it is not likely I will be able to get married because the muslim community is so small, and I am afraid I would become depressed. If I stay in Toronto, I can start looking to get married to have support and start a family, I have more support from the community, I can practice my religion more freely, I feel no anxiety. In summary, I am unsure what is better in the eyes of Allah: going back to help more my parents, or stay in Toronto and get married, secure my religion and visit my parents to help them once in a while. JazakAllah Kheiran.