Husband's Obedience

As-salam `alaykum. I would like to ask you about the concept of obedience of a wife to her husband. It is my belief that this relates to religious matters, not to trivial issues such as making a cup of tea when told so. I understand that doing such a thing for one's husband is out of courtesy and a means of strengthening marital relationship; but is this the meaning of obedience? There is much discussion and misunderstanding on the concept of a wife's obedience, so please answer this question as fully as possible, making a clear distinction between courtesy, respect and obedience.JazakumAllahu Khayran.

Scholars of Islam, as-salamu `alaykum. Can a husband make his wife work outside the house in order to buy unnecessary goods such as a fine car or the like, bearing in mind that he will be bothered if she refuses? What is the Islamic ruling on this?

As-Salamu `alaykum. What does Islam say about caring for family ties, especially parents, after a woman gets married? Can the husband for any reason forbid his wife from communicating with her family? Is that halal? What is a woman advised to do from the Islamic point of view in such a case?

Is it permissible for a Muslim woman to perform Hajj without taking her husband's permission?

Dear Brother, I am an American Muslimah married to an Arab Musim man.  We have been married over 20 years and and have 4 children and he has raised my 2 children from a previous marriage as his own, for which I hope he will be rewared well.the problem is that a few months ago he got a job for me which I like very much.  He has never held a steady job and calls himself a businessman.  His business is however irregular and not very dependable.  My job is teaching English as a foreign language as we live in an Arab country.  I teach children and oversee the English Department of the school in the morning and teach adults (usually my children's age) in the afternoon.  The job is respectable, comfortable, interesting and within walking distance of my home.  The pay is well above average for this country. My husband is now trying to bully me into quitting the job.  I don't want to disobey him just as disobedience.  We really need the money that I make.  As I already said he has no steady job and we are in a great deal of debt.  We have lived for years without medical or dental care, we live in his mothers house, we have no home of our own.  Sometimes we have to ask his elderly mother for food.  Most of the things we have are castoffs of his relatives.  Nothing ever gets repaired unless it affects his mother.  When we are tight on money, he verbably abuses me and the children (the smallest of whom is 13 years old), and has thrown things at me.  He sends me to relatives to borrow money which he never pays back.  He has begun borrowing from my reveativly newly married daughters, and is causing stress in their marriages, because he doesn't pay back the debts.  I feel that I have decieved them because he told them he would pay them and some other relatives out of my salary.as I said, I don't want to disobey him, but we are in a lot of trouble financially and I know that I can help with my job.  How can it be right to cheat and lie to people and wrong to work?thank you very much and God bless you