First of all, we’d like to state that a Muslim should seek a righteous spouse for marriage. Religion and good character should be the top concern of every Muslim when looking for a spouse. This is compatible with the Prophet’s guidance: “If a person of acceptable religion and character presents himself for marriage, marry him, otherwise, there would be widespread sedition and rampant corruption in the land.” Therefore, we advise every single Muslim out there to concern themselves first of all with the morals and characters of the would-be husband or the would-be wife, in shaa’ Allah.
Moreover, muslims are highly encouraged to offer Istikharah Prayer to seek Allah’s guidance before taking any decisions, marriage included.
Istikharah prayer is a two-rak`ah non-obligatory Prayer by which one seeks Allah’s guidance when he/she is confused or can’t choose between permissible alternatives. In this case, the Muslim should pray to Allah the Almighty to guide him to whatever He sees fit for him and make his heart satisfied with the decision.
In the Prayer, one asks Allah to facilitate the matter if it is good and turn it away if it is not. Thus, after praying Istikharah, one should decide on a course of action, and trust that if the matter does not work out, it is because it was not good for them. One should not then feel disappointed if things did not go as hoped.
After having done istikharah, one should follow the decision that he is strongly inclined to. If he feels no such inclination, then he should choose one of the options; he can rest assured that Allah will guide his steps. It has been reported that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said, “One who asks Allah for guidance in choosing the best course of action will never be a loser.”
It is not at all necessary for a person to have visions or dreams following Istikharah. However, if a person does experience a vision or dream, and he feels strongly about it, he should follow it.
Elaborating on the sign of response that one can see after doing istikharah, Dr. Muzammil Siddiqi, head of the Islamic Society of North America (ISNA) and member of the Fiqh Council ofNorth America, states:
“After offering Istikharah, you may do whatever is best in your understanding or whatever convinces you. You may repeat the du`a’ of Istikharah several times if you are still hesitant. It is not necessary to dream about anything and you do not have to wait for an answer in your dreams. It is reported in a Hadith that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said: “O Anas, when you intend to do some important things, then seek the good (seek Istikharah) from your Lord seven times and then do that to which your heart (or mind) is inclined, because the good is in it.”
Most of the hadiths on this subject do not talk about any dream. However, the famous Hanafi jurist Ibn `Abdeen has suggested in his Hashiyah that one should make the Istikharah Prayer before sleeping, and should sleep after having performed Wudu’. The face should be towards Makkah. If one sees something white or green in one’s dream, then the answer is yes, but if one sees something dark or red then the answer is no.
Other jurists of Shafi`i, Maliki, Hanbali and Ja`fari schools say that one should do that which is most convincing. According to Imam Malik, other people can also perform Istikharah on behalf of someone.
there is nothing strange about dreams. If you did not see any dreams, then it does not mean that dreams do not occur. After the Istikharah Prayer, some people may see a dream and some may not. We know that some of our dreams become true. Some time we see something in a dream and it happens exactly the same way later. As there are good dreams and bad dreams, so there are also true and false dreams. The interpretation of dreams is a special knowledge that some people have. In the Qur’an many dreams are mentioned. Prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him) saw in his dream that he was sacrificing his son. Prophet Yusuf (peace be upon him) had dreams and Allah also gave him the knowledge of interpreting dreams. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) also sometimes interpreted the dreams of his Companions.”