Procrastination is a widespread issue, particularly among students who often leave assignments, projects, and exam preparation until the last minute. It’s important to recognize that while this behavior is common, it can have long-term negative effects if not addressed.
Your concern as a parent is commendable, and it’s crucial to understand the root causes of procrastination to effectively help your son.
REASON 1: Disinterest in the Task
Often, procrastination occurs because the individual does not enjoy the task at hand. If your son eagerly engages in activities he enjoys but delays those he finds less interesting, it’s likely a sign that he simply doesn’t like the subject matter. For instance, if he consistently postpones his physics assignments or writing tasks, it might be because he finds them unappealing.
REMEDY:
Remind him of the saying, “Every duty which is bidden to wait returns with seven fresh duties at its back.” Procrastination is a habit that can be unlearned through consistent effort. Encourage him to take immediate steps to start the tasks he is avoiding. Although this might be difficult initially, with repetition, it will become a new, positive habit. This process aligns with the teachings of our Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, who emphasized the importance of seeking Allah’s guidance in all matters through Istikharah.
REASON 2: It’s Been Effective in the Past
Sometimes, procrastination becomes a habit because it has worked in the past. If your son has managed to complete assignments at the last minute without facing serious consequences, he may continue this behavior, believing it’s an effective strategy.
REMEDY:
Encourage him to start tasks early. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, prayed for blessings in the early morning endeavors of his Ummah, which suggests the importance of starting work early in the day. Remind your son that while last-minute efforts might have worked before, they also lead to unnecessary stress, anxiety, and a lack of true excellence.
REASON 3: Perfectionism
Some people delay tasks because they are waiting for the “perfect” time or conditions. They may feel that unless they can do something perfectly, it’s better not to start at all.
REMEDY:
Teach him that perfection is an unrealistic goal and that aiming for success rather than perfection is more practical. Remind him of the wisdom in the quote, “Aim for success, not perfection.” Emphasize that every effort, even if not perfect, is valuable and that Allah (SWT) looks at the effort and sincerity behind actions, not just the outcomes.
REASON 4: Fear of Losing Autonomy
In some cases, procrastinators delay tasks because they feel their autonomy is threatened, especially if they’ve grown up in a highly controlled environment.
REMEDY:
Give your son the space to manage his responsibilities independently. Trust him to make his own decisions about how and when to complete his assignments. This will help him develop a sense of ownership and responsibility for his work.
REASON 5: Fear of Being Alone
Some procrastinators may delay tasks because they fear being left alone or need constant support.
REMEDY:
Encourage your son to build confidence in his abilities. Remind him that he can achieve his goals independently and that others might not always be available to help. This is a valuable lesson for life beyond university.
Finally, as a parent, continue to make du`aa’ for your son, asking Allah to guide him and help him overcome this habit. Change takes time, and with patience, persistence, and prayer, your son can develop better habits and succeed in his studies.
May Allah reward your efforts and guide your son on the right path.